Toast to Hayley and Tommy

Hello, I'm Hayley's little sister Taylor.Congratulations Hayley and Tommy. Hayley is the most hard working and best person I've ever met. she has been by best friend since birth.  I wouldn't be the person I am today with out her example of hard work and determination, advice and sometimes tough love. I always was the annoying little sister who looked up to her so much and wanted to be just like her and spend all of my time with her. But even though I annoyed her she always was an amazing big sister who was there for me & protected me no matter what. She deserves all the happiness in the world and  I am so glad she found Tommy . I couldn't have imagined a better partner for my sister and my brother in law. He is so kind, calm, and funny and does so much for my sister, thanks for making my sister so happy. Welcome to the family. Love y'all so much! Mom would be so proud. Y'all are going to have an amazing and adventurous life together!

Personal Statement

Since I was very young, I have known about the fascinating field of counseling.  My mom was a counselor. She loved working with her clients and helping them heal, find courage and sometimes peace. She worked with couples and families. Her passion and enthusiasm for her career showed on her face when she talked about her practice.  Although she never divulged specifics about her clients, she would share that she had a great day and that it was a honor to work with so many unique individuals, no client or day was ever alike.

I was twelve years old when my mom died from cancer. Experiencing grief at such a young age, taught me a lot of things, such as life is short and precious so it is important to make every moment count.

I knew early on that I wanted to make a difference. When I was younger I never felt like I fit in so I went out of my way to help make sure that other kids did not feel the same way. In high school I started a support group with my friend for fellow high schoolers who had disabilities. I was diagnosed with a mild form of Cerebral Palsy that affects my right arm and leg.  I struggled but had a sincere desire to become independent.

 My experiences with cerebral palsy have given me a deeper understanding of myself and I believe that I can relate well  to people who have gone through similar mental and physical challenges

At Clemson, I pursued a degree in Psychology with a minor in Recreational Therapy. It is my dream to become a counselor and make a difference in the lives of others. Throughout college I volunteered for ClemsonLife for the students who have intellectual disabilities and worked at Camp Burnt Gin in the summers for children and young adults with all types of disabilities.

After graduating from Clemson, I became a Registered Behavioral Technician. I worked directly with kids with autism to help improve their social skills and behavioral issues. My training prepared me with the skills to teach the students techniques to reduce ineffective behaviors. Working and applying my skills has been valuable. I  got to see the children prosper and although its not easy, I loved seeing the results ( when they happen). Now I am a preschool teacher and I get to apply what I learned as a behavioral technician to the children at the pre school.  Although, I am good at my position, I want a career that is more focused on improving individuals mental health and well being.

People Treat You How They Feel about Themselves

The way people treat you is a reflection of who they are and how they feel about themselves.It is not a reflection of who you are. It is always less personal than it seems.  Hurt people hurt people, genuinely happy people dont waste their time or energy to go out of their way to tear people down. If people treat you poorly it usually has a lot more to do with their own insecurities, jealousy, misplaced anger, and projections than who you are as a person. Your reflection is determined by how you treat others and yourself despite what other people treat you.

Things I've learned in beach reflections with my friend Derek a while ago :

 

1. You can only help those who want to be helped because you can't fight someone else's battle and sometimes it is necessary to learn from your own mistakes. 

2. People get frustrated at things other people do yet don't realize or want to admit that they do the same exact things to others

3. No matter how much you have improved, there is always room to grow

4. Actions and non verbal cues speak louder than words

5. Everyone wants to be heard but it is harder to listen, we tend to listen to respond not to understand

6. No one likes to be wrong yet it is hard to admit when someone else is right

7. The law of attraction is one of the most powerful forces on earth. You really do attract the vibes that you give/put out to the universe- karma

8.  The universe is for you, and so is everything else

It is all about perspective

Go where you are wanted

 It's so strange how sometimes you can't control who you like or care about both in friendship or as more. It can also be hard to describe why you like or are attracted to someone, sometimes it can be an indescribable feeling, chemistry or understanding of each other. It is strange how humans are drawn to and want what we can't have. Strange why we still care or its hard to let go when the other person does not reciprocate. Maybe that is why a crush is called a crush, it ends up crushing you when your crush does not like you back. But being on different levels or unrequited friendships can be just as hard as unrequited love. It is interesting or strange that we can end up on such different levels with people because logically or naturally you would think you would be most attracted to people who reciprocate the enjoyment of your company equally but that is not always the case.

And not always being able to control these feelings can be annoying and frustrating. Because logically you know It is best to go where you are wanted, where your energy is reciprocated, appreciated and celebrated. Nothing short of people who consider you a fuck yes because there is no point or worth in lukewarm with anything in life, including  friendships and relationships.You deserve nothing less than that in life, people who love you and see the best in you. 

Yet sometimes you can't help but care about someone who doesn't care about you. Even when you know you shouldn't and even when you tell yourself you don't but deep down you still do. But maybe there is nothing wrong with that and it just proves how beautiful, loving, and caring your soul really is, to care despite if you get anything back and the ability to see the good in everyone. Or it could be an unrealistic desire to want to be friends with everyone and liked by everyone when truth is there is more to people than the good you see or not everyone has the same heart as you.

 Rejection is really hard but usually it is this way because the people who you care about who may not feel the same way now or are not on your level are the rare people who made you feel like you were seen, maybe even the people who have made you feel the most seen, cared about, appreciated, or understood. But sometimes things change or those people have other people that make them feel more. And so you realize that even though you can't help that you care, your realize it is not worth your energy to go where you aren't wanted. You realize maybe letting go isn't this thing you can do all at once in a quick easy moment but more of a constant  reminder of your worth, that you deserve to go where people love you, see the best in you and where your energy is reciprocated,celebrated,and appreciated. Letting go is appreciating memories, experiences, and connections when the energy is reciprocated but then wishing them the best and letting it be when you are not on the same level or the energy is not reciprocated, because going where you are wanted is the only place worth going. 

Life

 It's ok that it has taken me longer to figure out what I want to do with my life.

I appreciate and value the experiences that it took for me to get there and all of the lesson I learned from it all.

I am content with my current occupation, helping the kiddos become good little human beings. It has meaning.

I will manifest my dreams of becoming a social worker/counselor, making a difference in people's lives, a meaningful career.

I will manifest my dreams of traveling.

I manifest finding my people, meaningful connections.

I will manifest a happy life.

I will be present and content in the current moment rather than always needing to strive for more but also find balance in working towards always growing, learning, improving and creating a good future.

I love myself, I accept myself and my flaws.

I will focus on my strengths not my insecurities but also strive to improve the things I can change.

I won't be too hard on myself. But will hold myself accountable to always try to be better

I will be the change I wish to see in the world. 

 I will always remember to be thankful for my life and all that I have,who and what I get to experience 

The moon

 Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the Moon. 🌙

I can't help but believe in the magic and beauty of this universe when I look up at that the moon. We are a part of something bigger than ourselves, this universe. And looking at the moon reminds me how small are problems are compared to the size of the universe and all that is going on for us to be a live and witnessing this miracle called life right at this very moment. We are not just part of the universe, but one way of looking at things, is that we are the universe because our atoms are made of the same elements that came from the stars,  and we are just experiencing or expressing ourselves as humans for a while.

Looking at the moon can make me believe anything is possible,opportunities endless, miracles can happen and maybe there is purpose and meaning and more to this universe, whether it is God or some other higher power/ greater being and life after death, whether it be heaven or reincarnation or something else. I guess the mystery and infinite possibilities of it all is what makes this universe so amazing, magical and beautiful. And even if there isn't something else, experiencing this one life and being a part of this amazing galaxy is something more or big in itself, it is more than magical and spectacular enough.